Wednesday, November 21, 2007

A Carnivore that rides a bike leaves a bigger carbon footprint than a Vegan who drives a SUV, its a proven fact!

I am a Female...I have made MILK....I have had swollen, ENGORGED breasts...on the verge of infected Mastisis. I have had a son who I bonded with in less than the time it took for him to take his first breath or have his first cry. I can identify with a 'dairy' cow. A mama who is artificially inseminated 3 or more times a year since she was 1 year old...or raped...all to have her baby stolen from her within hours of birth. Despite what many think, Cows are very maternal, and cry for their babies long after they are gone. I have had a son...a boy baby. If I were a cow, my boy baby would be stolen from me, never to return...only to live a horribly torturous, miserable, short life, a byproduct of the veal industry...the same torture as the Mama Cow...the only thing worse than her horrible life as a dairy cow is her inhumane, unfathomably tortoruous slaughter. If I had a girl, she would still be stolen from me, and eventually after being raped and inseminated, year after year...suffer the same fate as I...having my throat slit open without pain killers, having my trachea ripped out, then being left to bleed to death which can take many many hours...and they are the lucky ones.
I can relate. I am a female, I make milk, I've had a babe. My heart aches for what the mama cows go through...unfathomable torture day in and day out..unspeakable matter how much denial most of this country is still is still a reality.

I have so much to say

I have a lot to say. I have a lot to say about birth, and vaccinations, and child abuse and animal abuse and animal torture and the veal industry and veganism, and AUTISM, and Paganism. What I know is that no one listens if I'm 280 lbs. with very short dark brown hair. I know this because I was once skinny with long blonde hair and did my makeup everyday. I have a lot to say to my sons future teachers and schools. I have to be taken seriously and I know how to get that accomplished...look good. I accept this social stereotype because I have lived it. I'm not even offended by it because I know it to be is what America accepts and since I live here, I accept it. I have been the girl that has everything done for her and given to her and I have been the girl that has been the recipient of massive rudeness and ignored while having my thoughts ignored. Being an activist at heart, I realize this does not work for me. I am currently detoxing, losing weight, redoing my outward appearance...for my health and future, and my sons future, and so people will listen to what I have to say. I have a lot to say. I am EXTREMELY PASSIONATE about so much...about toxic lead filled toys from China...about proving that we are poisoning our children with mercury in the form of Thimerosol in the evils of the veal/DAIRY industry, and the torture and pain we inflict upon animals. To the voiceless words of young babes being hurt, scared, and the comfort and joy I feel with the neo pagan movement. I'm not ignorant to the facts of what fellow humans want their activists to look like to be taken seriously, and I must be taken seriously because I am passionate about what i have to say and there is so much to say [to stop the pain, cruelty, torture and that there is worldwide compassion and acceptance].

Saturday, November 17, 2007


Where to start...I guess first things first is that I'm detoxing. I have been for about a week now...I decided to quit the Pepsi. My addiction to Pepsi was outta control!! More than a 2L a day. I wouldn't eat unless I had pepsi to go with it. I wanted off of it, mostly because of the evil High fructose Corn syrup! I mean, I go out of my way to buy ketchup, bbq sauce, jellies and jams, juices, etc. that don't have it in it, even pasta sauce! I mean, come on! HFCS is one of the reasons I'm so fat. It is evil and hidden in sooooooo many items! So, while chugging my liter of HFCS one day, I realized change is inevitable. I went cold turkey. I had so much caffeine built up in my system that it took about 2 days for my withdrawl headache to kick in. After a day or so of intense pain, my sister and I realized that I could drink coffee. Afterall the reason I was getting off Pepsi was for the HFCS, not the caffiene. I have no idea how to spell that word. Anyways, so I had a nice cup of hot coffee and voila, no headache...ahhh how the aches and pains of detoxing are soothed out when that headache is gone. My doctor said my heart can't have caffeine, but I'm not going to be a coffee addicted freak like I once was in my early 20's. But I am have officially switched from Pepsi to coffee and am happy about it. I am drinking water like never before. I figure the more water I drink, the faster I will detox so I'm drinking. The only other beverage I have had is limeade, with no HFCS. It does the trick.

I am doing my version of oral chelation (heavy metal detox) which is cilantro. I buy it in the tincture which is in alcohol and very strong, so I the 40 drops into my limeade and it covers the taste.

I am also doing a liver cleanse by way of Milk Thistle, and blood cleanse by way of Greens....which is what I call it, its basically every good green veggie including wheatgrass in a powder form that I put in my ice cold water (thanks Brian!)with organic lemon juice.

I am also doing a candida cleanse, I can't think of the name of the product right now and since I'm tucked away in bed with my 2 guys snoring away, it'll have to wait....but there is a capsule and a tincture, it was $35 which is too much for me, but I feel it is necessary, plus I wanted to know what I'll be putting Bastian through next month.

With the greens and lemon juice everday, I'm also alkalizing my body which will eventually refine my palette and I will enjoy vegan foods even more....not to mention lose weight because my body won't be an acidic, inflamed environment anymore.

I've also started walking, everday, on my new treadstepper, but since I'm so out of shape I have it on just treadmill mode, which still makes me sweat so I figure its all good.

I also have finally completely taken dairy and eggs out of my diet.YEAH VEGAN!!!
I have been vegetarian now for 6 years and have made the transition to STRICT VEGANISM and am very happy about it.

Oh yeah and how could I forget the Captain...I haven't drinken any alcohol (rum) since I started this cleanse over a week ago!

I can't say I have huge noticeable affects yet but I know they are coming!

I did notice tonight that I was happy, smiling and laughing..something I don't always feel like doing....maybe this is working, or maybe its because my sexy husband took lil bubba to the museum today for 4 hours while I soaked in a bubblebath and surfed the web!

I always try to detox when the moon is waning, but it just worked out that I started on the new moon, so I'm going to cleanse for 28 days instead of 2 weeks, and take advantage of the 2 weeks of waning moon coming up (and really get the toxins and rotting crap out of my body), and end on a new moon. Then rebuild during the next 2 weeks of the waxing moon.

My goal is to lose 120 lbs., and this is the first step of my journey...and I'm also going to start Yoga.

Friday, October 5, 2007


He graduated from his special shoes at night. So, after 8 casts, 1 surgery and 5 pairs of special shoes at night, (with a horrible metal bar between them)...WE ARE DONE! WHEW! We did it! At the beginning of it, when he was born with his little clubbed foot and I heard the therapy took almost 3 years, I didn't know if we'd make it, but we did, and it was successful! Dr. says his foot is perfect! He's such a trooper :)

I was born to tell him I love him

Today, my precious baby boy got officially diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. More specifically Pervasive Developemental Disorder:Not Otherwise Specified with Sensory Intergration Disorder. I have heard the Doctors 'opinions' for months now, but today was the officially diagnosis.
After 2 hours at that appointment, we got in the, crying of course with the shock of this 'lifelong diagnosis' I turned on the radio and 'Beautiful Day' by U2 was on. Just then a train passed us and we followed it on the windy streets in the hills while my baby yelled "TRAIN!!" over and over. The sky was cloudy and it was sprinkly. It was beautiful.
As I sit here still crying, I am OK. It's not Full blown Autism, which I picture on the left side of the Spectrum. Its PDD:NOS which is somewhere in the middle. The doctors suspect it will turn into Aspergers when his speech develops. His IQ is 91 which is only one point above 'below average', but officially he is average. They also suspect this will go up dramatically, also leading to the Aspergers diagnosis because hes very smart.
I will give all of the details tommorrow, I need to go cuddle with my guys and process this all.

Thursday, September 27, 2007


I wouldn't change him for the world

I got a letter in the mail from the Developemental Pediatrician that we saw a few weeks ago. It was his 4 page assessment of Seb. He has not been diagnosed yet. It was all very interesting, I guess the most poignoint sentence was "I strongly believe Sebastian qualifies for having Autism Spectrum Disorder, and that subsequent testing will prove so". It was informative, and heartbreaking. It was just a lot in one day. I keep going over it, cotacting who he wants me to contact and doing what he wants me to be doing.
Inhome ABA costs $75 an house which is over $2,100 a week. So, I am learning ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis) myself so I can do it with him. I don't see why not. We have also started schooling. I will start keeping track of everything. We are taking him off of the sleep medicine the Dr. put him on. Especially now that he doesn't have to wear his shoes at night, he doesn't need them.

Dr. Hyman (a Dr. my sister and I both love) describes Autism as
"a systemic body disorder that affects the brain. A toxic environment
triggers certain genes in people susceptible to this condition."
So, I know where all my money is going to from now on. Organic food, natural cleaners, no chemicals, no chemicals in food. No dust. Filtered water for baths too. Cleansings...all natural clay baths. Detoxing. An organic environment. Breathin fresh air...(well thats free)..:)

One thing I know is that for this boy, I have to have unconditional love. He is not being a bad boy on purpose.. it's not that he wants to be difficult. Hes just different. It takes patience to accept him for who he is. I'm teaching him to be like others, I'm teaching him social skills, etc. but honestly, I wouldn't change him for the world.